Dinner Date! Part 1 of 2

  • Posted on: January 9th, 2008 by

Mating rituals are not exclusive to the human race. Even a tiny-sized creature such as a fruit fly, which remarkably happens to have 60% of the same DNA as humans and survives only about two months,
Fruit Flies BBC engages in an elaborate mating ritual where the male fly vibrates its wings with a courtship song and licks the female fly while engaging in sex, which may last anywhere from a few minutes to several hours, depending on the species.
Fruit Flies and Sex
The miracle here is that day after day, year after year, decade after decade, life species carry cellular DNA and genetics that are part of their unique survival and individual hardwiring – even if the species’ actual physical life span is short; and that includes us!

Historical behaviors, genetics and mating rituals can be found everywhere in the animal kingdom. Did you know that certain birds trade reproduction favors for food?

Yes, prostitution (one of the oldest professions) even exists among birds.
Birds and Mating

And did you also know that sexual cannibalism is common practice with praying mantises and scorpions?
Sexual Cannibalism PBS.org

So, what exactly does all this have to do with a “dinner date?” Well, for me – from what I have come to know about human nature, survival and evolution on every life level – a lot!

There was a man I went out with about a month ago. To start with, he ordered “a cup of hot tea.” I didn’t give his herbal tea order much thought. Hey, maybe he had had a rough night before or is in The Program; who knows?

I was not judging him or his hot beverage choice and I barely knew him. But, it was noted. Not in a negative or positive way; but noted.

Later, when the waiter arrived back at our table, I ordered the restaurant’s signature Grilled Chicken Club Sandwich with fries. My dinner date followed suit and ordered the exact same thing.

Soon after the food was served, I noticed that he was ONLY eating the chicken and nothing else on his plate. All of a sudden I’m feeling like Hungry Man Jack, capital HMJ. While I dug heartily into the delicious meal and drank white wine, he daintily sipped his hot tea and slowly poked and picked away at his food like a very finicky and picky eater.

For me it was a bit of an ah-ha moment, as it was the first time I could really understand why men get so turned off and annoyed with women who don’t eat on dates or just “order the salad.”

The more he poked and picked, the more irritated I became. Literally, I was having a basic animal primal response to his eating behavior. I finally asked him why he was only eating the chicken and nothing else on his plate. He said it was because of his “digestion.” OK, not exactly sexy, but I’m cool with that. More importantly, what I couldn’t understand was why he ordered this particular dish when there were so many other items on the menu that potentially did not affect his “digestion” or create food waste.


This is not a rant, I’m just being honest. It was extremely hard for me to watch him not eat the food that he knew off the get-go he was not going to eat.

The longer I sat there watching him pick over his plate of food, the more unattractive he became.

Also he never offered to share, which would have been nice since he was not eating it anyway…

Date over.

This is Part One of a two-part blog post, so please leave any thoughts or ideas you think are relevant for the next Dinner Date post.

Till then eat, drink, and be merry!
Happy New Year!

  • Anonymous

    Jennifer — were there other things about him that you didn’t like? Perhaps you are being too hard on him. Being a picky eater, digestion problem, or not making the best choice on the dish he ordered does not seem like it should be deal breaker or irritate one quite so much.

    Not inferring this applies to you, but the really good date experiences I have had are with dates that aren’t so picky about every detail. No one is perfect. One of the problems with online dating is that there is such a HUGE choice of people that if you meet a person and ONE thing is wrong, you move on to the next person in the queue. Perhaps too much choice is a bad thing. Spend time with someone long enough to really get to know them.

  • Jennifer

    Anonymous, I agree with you, I actually had met him at a event, he seemed like a good guy… It was just hard for me to watch him pick and poke, no one is going to be perfect… so I do keep that in mind. It was interesting to me that it effected me as much as it did… (it really was a basic primal feeling). I will be posting part 2 on Sunday I would love to get more of your feedback, it’s valid and good!

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About Jennifer

Jennifer Kelton

Jennifer Kelton CEO / founder Badonlinedates.com LLC is a Los Angeles native and a pioneer in the worldwide dating industry, investigating the game of love while providing encouragement and support since 2007, starting with the acclaimed dating book Don’t Use My Sweater like a Towel. An accomplished CEO, visionary and entrepreneur, Kelton’s work in the […]

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