Dating Don’ts: Know Your Textiquette

  • Posted on: September 24th, 2009 by


By:Judy McGuire

Texting has become as ubiquitous as the cell phones that birthed them, but what is it doing to our love lives? Can you imagine what a different movie “Casablanca” would be if, instead of suavely growling, “Here’s looking at you, kid,” Rick instead texted Ilsa:

; – )

Same sentiment (sort of), yet all the romance, sexiness and possibility has been drained out of it.

Far from simplifying male/female relations, texting adds a whole other layer to decipher. I got to thinking about this after my friend Jane called, asking for my take on a new guy she’d been out with a couple times. He had been sending mixed signals and then late one night she got a text that simply read, “U out?”

Not even a complete sentence! This wasn’t an old friend or an established relationship—this was a guy she’d barely started dating. It wasn’t even clear if this message was sent to her or to every girl in his phone book. So I thought it was time we clarified a few things and assembled a panel of women to dissect the matter.

1st D8s
Most of the women I spoke with agreed that at least in the beginning of a relationship, the guy should make a little effort and actually eke out a phone call. Meghan, 32, says, “Otherwise it feels like a booty call kind of thing—too informal, and not enough respect.”

But bar owner/personal trainer Melody disagrees. “I have become a phone-a-phobe,” she confesses. “Calling me now is so personal and awkward. It’s like a stranger suddenly patting my butt.” Yikes! Or should I say, : – 0


Speaking of emoticons, even when they themselves use them, most women feel men should not. “I feel the same way about emoticons as I do about men wearing briefs and Day-Glo high tops,” asserted Karen, a 24-year-old journalist. “Should never, ever be done!” Thirty-three-year-old Jennifer agrees, “It’s annoying enough when girls do it, but a guy who texts with emoticons may as well be wearing a skirt.”

When It’s : – )

Everyone agreed that phone flirting is a go. “A flirty text leads to twitterpations galore,” says Megan. Jennifer, who just started seeing her new man, says, “Out of the blue at random times he will text ‘thinking of you’ and it just makes me happy.”
Though she dramatically claims texting has ruined her love life, bawdy Selina says it can be fun, within certain parameters: “The only thing texting is good for is sexy talk to rile him up while you’re on your way to meet up.”
Read more here. The Frisky

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About Jennifer

Jennifer Kelton

Jennifer Kelton CEO / founder LLC is a Los Angeles native and a pioneer in the worldwide dating industry, investigating the game of love while providing encouragement and support since 2007, starting with the acclaimed dating book Don’t Use My Sweater like a Towel. An accomplished CEO, visionary and entrepreneur, Kelton’s work in the […]

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