By Juliette McGough
There are many ways to attract a potential mate. Most people will dress nice, pay for a meal or two and once in a while throw in an “I love you” to seal the deal. However, men will try many ways to avoid one, or all, of the items listed above. Recently, a company has created men’s magnetic underwear. Talk about attraction. These interesting briefs literally have a magnetic strip in the crotch for easy and quick fastening. I would think that most men would not want a pair of briefs that literally fasten themselves; some could even argue that in injury could occur. Ouch.
Men would love to have a pair of briefs that literally do all the matchmaking for them, all they need is to find a woman who is also wearing magnetic panties and it is an instant matching service. No thinking, no swooning, just connection…literally. When a man’s crotch gravitates toward a woman’s crotch without any brainpower, it must be a match made in magnetic men’s underwear heaven.
Thankfully, they have not invented magnetic panties for women. But what will women think when they reach that point in their relationship when they want to sleep with their potential mate, and they pull down his pants to find a different kind of brief, specifically magnetic? A woman potentially could think that her man is similar to an eight year old and needs an easy way to pee, because whipping it out through a hole is so difficult. It actually takes brainpower and hand-eye coordination. She could also think that your magnetic man panties are something you picked up at the local yoga store, an essential item for aligning your chi in your nether regions.
Not only could magnetic man panties be detrimental to your love life, but they could also be hazardous to your everyday life. What happens when you go through security at an airport and those briefs set off the x-ray machines? You can be the reason that the TSA feels the need to grab every boob and crotch in America, and that is a heavy burden to carry. What will happen when you try to walk around in a room full of refrigerators and your crotch goes flying towards the nearest icebox? Awkward. Magnetic underwear should not be allowed to infiltrate men’s closets because it would encourage other companies to create magnetic products that could ruin dates forever, such as magnetic bra straps! (I guess technically that would make your date very happy, and possibly score you some points) The only magnetic energy that should be flying around on your date is his heart to yours (barf).