My girlfriend’s “married” mom hits on me all the time! Sometimes even right smack in front of her. While her mom is attractive and on her second husband, I’m not into Mrs. Robinson, and also feel it’s so disrespectful to both of us and our budding relationship. What is the best way to say something that will not offend her?
Mom hits on me?
As funny as Justin Timberlake and Andy Samberg’s SNL digital short about banging moms was, that’s how creepy and awful your predicament is.
It seems pretty obvious that there are serious issues at play in a house where a mother thinks it’s okay to blatantly flirt with her daughter’s boyfriend in plain sight, so the truth is there is no “best way” to handle this powder-keg situation.
I’m of the belief that confronting an issue is the best and only way to make it go away. I had a psychology professor who taught us that you need to address a feeling and admit you’re having it in order to come to terms with it. For example, if you say out loud, “I’m scared,” or “I’m angry,” you’ll feel less so.
I think the only course of action is to tell your girlfriend’s mother that her advances make you uncomfortable and you take them as a sign of disrespect to her daughter. That way not only will you clear the air, but if it gets back to your girlfriend, it won’t make you look like a narcissistic weirdo having a sex talk with her mom; it’ll make it seem like you were sticking up for her and your relationship.
Once you’ve addressed the problem, keep a respectful distance from her mom whenever possible until things normalize. You should also speak to your girlfriend about your concerns as she surely must have feelings about her mom’s boundary issues. Who knows, this might bring you two closer together, just as long as you make sure you handle it with tact and respect, two things that appear to be tragically lacking in your girlfriend’s household.
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