A Man’s POV How it Makes Me Feel When… She Expects a Romantic Valentine’s Day

  • Posted on: February 7th, 2012 by

By WisdomIsMisery

This may come as a bit of a surprise to many of you but I’m not a big fan of Valentine’s Day. But why? It’s a day for the celebration of love, right? The fact that it’s crammed into a 24-hour period coinciding with a retail marketing blitz after the lull of post-Christmas sales is purely coincidental, I’m sure.

You show me a man who honestly looks forward to Valentine’s Day and I’ll show you a man standing next to his significant other. However, as with so many other personal scarifies needed to keep peace in my home, attempting to resist Valentine’s Day is futile. Instead, like most men, I prefer to lament internally while smiling externally. Therefore, every year I succumb with only minimal protest.

Accurately assessing where my current significant other falls on the high/low maintenance scale determines how miserable my Valentine’s Day will be. Regardless, I often start by purchasing the obligatory box of heart-shaped chocolates, schedule a “romantic dinner”, and if I play my cards right, I can look forward to an entire evening or 18 minutes – whichever comes first – filled with Valentine’s Day sex. For the record, as far as I’m concerned, this last activity is clearly the only real necessity of the entire day.

I guess I really have nothing against Valentine’s Day even if I don’t understand the point. A quick search of the most trusted source on the Internet, Wikipedia, volunteered the following information:

Saint Valentine’s Day, commonly shortened to Valentine’s Day, is a holiday observed on February 14th honoring one or more early Christian martyrs named Saint Valentine. It is traditionally a day on which lovers express their love for each other by presenting flowers, offering confectionery, and sending greeting cards.

Other than the fact that I have no idea what confectionery means – although it sounds expensive – by definition, Valentine’s Day sounds pretty awesome. Too often, however, it is not. There are too many questions to ask and correctly answer: Do I even owe her gift? How much should I pay? (I don’t want to set the bar too high for future years!) Should I get a card to go with said gift? In total, how many gifts should my gift encompass? Where should I take her for dinner? What is the appropriate amount of time to wait after dinner before attempting to rip off that expensive dress she bought for the night with my teeth? WHY CAN’T I FIND A TEDDY BEAR THAT DOESN’T HAVE ‘I Love You’ EMBLAZONED ON IT’S HEART-SHAPED TUMMY? …wait, do I love her?

So much pressure!!!

This is why I prefer to allocate my displays of affection throughout the course of the year. I don’t need to wait until February 14th – and hopefully this date hasn’t alarmed any male readers who are only just now realizing Valentine’s Day is less than a week away – in order to show or tell the woman I love that I love her. Why must the love I feel all 364 days culminate in one 24-hour period?

To tell the truth, I actually love being in love. I love showing and expressing that love. What I’m against is being forced to arbitrarily demonstrate my affections because some guy somewhere decided that February 14th was the optimal time to do so. I will love my significant other on February 13th as much as I will on February 15th and every other day in the year. In fact, my love should continue to grow, not peak and then dissipate simply because Valentine’s Day came and went. No amount of candy, stuffed animals, and 1-day affections will ever fully capture the love I feel for the woman in my life. Such a mediocre expectation should be insulting to the love we have for one another.

In the end, I guess, I hope I’m remembered for the affirmations of love I express beyond Valentine’s Day. If that is the case, then I have no real protest. Having cleared my conscious, I can happily wish the woman in my life a Happy Valentine’s Day, while hoping I have provided her with everything she wanted and needed on Saint Valentine’s Day but more important to me, every other day of the year as well. Together I hope we choose to prioritize celebrating the passing of years between each Valentine’s Day, not the passage of a single V-day. To me, this is a much greater measurement of the success and merits of our relationship. I hope she agrees.

I wish you and yours the same. Happy Valentine’s Day.




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About Jennifer

Jennifer Kelton

Jennifer Kelton CEO / founder Badonlinedates.com LLC is a Los Angeles native and a pioneer in the worldwide dating industry, investigating the game of love while providing encouragement and support since 2007, starting with the acclaimed dating book Don’t Use My Sweater like a Towel. An accomplished CEO, visionary and entrepreneur, Kelton’s work in the […]

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