Dear Sasha,
I recently went out with a guy that used coupons to pay for our dinner.
It was our first date. I was a bit turned off. Am I being too judgmental?

Sincerely,
To coupon or not?

Dear Groupon Griper-

Yes, you’re being too judgmental!

I don’t know if you’ve heard about this or not, but we’re in the midst of a little something you could call The New Depression. That fiscal cliff everyone was freaking out about which we supposedly didn’t go over? Most folks plummeted off it like a drunk man in a barrel joyriding over Niagara Falls several years ago.

You should be happy your date took you to a meal at all. In this day and age, it would be perfectly reasonable to suggest enjoying a nice free walk during the getting-to-know-you portion of courtship. Like most people, this poor guy is probably scraping to get by, but he dug you enough to throw down some scrilla and take you out like a lady. So what if he was looking for a discount? Just be grateful he didn’t ask you to go Dutch.

Dating is expensive, especially if a man wants to make a strong impression. But, more often than not, that money might as well be served in a cream sauce along side your baked potato because it’s totally wasted on a first outing.

In fatter times, one of my best friends took a woman to dinner at a fancy, stylish LA restaurant and dropped two hundred dollars on their first date. And they never went out again! He wasn’t into her, she wasn’t into him, but he wanted to save face and show her a good time, and she wanted to be wined and dined for a night. One insurance policy payment and a month’s worth of gas money later, they parted ways as slightly more familiar strangers. That’s just wasteful.

I think your date sounds savvy and responsible for having the forethought to make sure he could show you a good time without living on ramen for the rest of the month. What I wonder is why you needed him to lavish you with money and attention? If you have a good time with someone, it shouldn’t matter where they take you, be it a four star restaurant or Dennys. It’s about the time together, not the final tally on the check.

-Sasha

• Categories: Sasha Speaks: Answering Your Most Private Dating Questions
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