Thoughts From a Bartender: Can I Date an Over-Drinker?
- Posted on: January 3rd, 2013 by Jennifer
By: Lindsay Hopper
Most women have had the unfortunate experience of dating someone who, on occasion, has one too many drinks, usually resulting in an unnecessary fight that everyone always regrets in the morning. Some women deal with this more then on occasion and a few of them even deal with this on a regular basis. Which poses the question: how much is too much and how often is too often? Before you get into a seriously relationship with someone who “likes to have a good time” (a phrase which is always a warning sign, in my opinion), you should really take a second and ask yourself, “can I date an over-drinker?”
When you read studies about alcoholism, you realize that it is the furthest thing from black and white. There are all different types of alcoholics. Unfortunately, most people only see alcoholics as the one’s who drink all day, all night and are never sober. Dating THAT kind of over-drinker is pretty much always out of the question for everyone unless you, yourself are an addict. Or if you just REALLY like to take care of people, which is a whole other topic for another day. But what about the less conspicuous alcohol abusers?
We’ve got Mr. “I drink occasionally but every time I do, I black out. And If I don’t remember it, it didn’t happen.” This is a pretty common one because usually, the people that don’t drink a lot are the ones that over do it when they DO drink. The issue with this type of over-drinker is that they don’t ever seem to learn from their mistakes. They will, without fail, turn into a sloppy, reckless, rude, annoying drunk before they eventually either throw up or pass out. They only know what happened from what people tell them. How do you trust someone like this? Who’s to say that one night when you weren’t around, they weren’t off with some random trashy girl they just met? Or even worse, what if they committed a crime and didn’t know it? There is such a big window of error here; you’ll probably just end up driving yourself crazy trying to keep track of him!
The second most common one is the “I only drink socially but when I do, I turn into the Incredible Hulk” type of alcoholic. You definitely aren’t going to like him when he’s angry, that’s for sure. He starts out fun, usually the life of the party. Everyone will be having a grand old time and then BAM! WHAP! POW! The transformation happens. They turn stubborn, angry, mean, and incredibly judgmental and opinionated. This usually happens because of something someone says or does that triggers their inner beast and once that happens, there’s no turning back. If you disagree with this person or try to calm them down, it only makes them worse. The only thing you can do in this case is lock him in a room alone because unless you have magical powers, there is no way to change him back into Bruce Banner. Huge fights erupt, usually at least one person ends up in tears and things are usually never the same.
People are supposedly their most truthful when they’re drunk. So make sure you test him out with some tequila, and see who he becomes, before you go bringing him home to meet your parents.