A Man’s POV: How it Makes Me Feel When… She Won’t Date Me Because I’m a Single Dad

By JR Reed

I found her profile on an online dating site. It was amazing. She was hot. Really hot. Four-alarm fire hot. And funny. Successful too. She was almost too good to be true. I re-read the profile again; just to make sure I wasn’t crazy. Nope. Just as amazing as the first time I read it.

I quickly crafted a clever message to her and crossed my fingers as I waited for a reply. With a profile like that I knew she must get dozens (if not hundreds) of messages a day. I was hoping to get a reply, but I wasn’t sure that was even realistic.

She was beautiful and at first glance, wonderful. I was an average looking full-time single dad with a hectic job and a pre-teen daughter. It didn’t seem like a match made in heaven, but I’ve seen stranger things happen. Angelina Jolie married Billy Bob Thornton. If Angelina could marry Billy Bob, I had to believe I had a shot with this woman.

A couple days later my BlackBerry beeped. I had a new e-mail from the dating site and I was beyond excited to see she sent me a message. As I logged on I said a silent prayer. “C’mon God. Hook me up. I totally deserve this.”

“Thanks for the message,” she began. So far so good. “I don’t date guys with kids. Good luck.” I felt like I got junk punched. My heart plummeted into my stomach and I was really bummed. Is this what it felt like to be discriminated against? I didn’t know it was possible to be discriminated against for being a dad. Apparently it is.

I was 40 years old. How many 40-year-old guys have kids? I’m not going to take the time to do in-depth research, but I think its safe to assume that a high percentage of males my age have pro-created. I would also guess that a large number of these men have some sort of regular interaction with their kids.

“Well this sucks,” I thought. I wanted to ask her why, but I needed to take my time and not pop off with a diatribe of four-letter words. I sat and pondered her message for a few moments before sending her a reply.

“I’m sorry to hear that,” I wrote. “I’m kind of curious about something. WHY don’t you date guys with kids? Do you find many guys here who don’t have kids? I won’t bother you again, but if you could take a moment to answer my questions I would totally appreciate it.”

This time I figured for sure I would never hear from her, but 15 minutes later I received another message. I opened it and read her response.

“I don’t date guys with kids because I need to be the focal point of a man’s attention. If he has kids, it takes his attention away from me. I deserve to be taken on nice trips and to nice dinners. That won’t happen if someone has kids. As I said before, good luck.”

Wow. I guess I knew people like her existed, but I never thought I would personally encounter one. I’m a single dad and I’m happy to be one. When I got her first message I was sad. After thinking about it for a few minutes I realized it was her loss. Not mine.

She won’t date me because I’m a single dad? No problem. The right one is out there somewhere, and you know what? She’s going to love me BECAUSE I’m a single dad. When single dads find the right woman, we can absolutely find a spot for her in our lives and we will find the time to take them on nice trips and out to nice dinners. Single dads know how to truly love others. Maybe one day she’ll figure that out. But I doubt it.

A Man’s POV: How it Makes Me Feel When… She’s Flirting With Other Men in Front of Me

She’s (My Date) Blatantly Flirting With Other Men in Front of Me

By Patrick Curry

Now when you’re out and about on a date with a cute girl, I’m going to assume that you’re going to aim (or you damn well better if you plan to get anywhere with her) to put your best foot forward: to be funny, to really listen to what she has to say and really learn about her, to ask questions. In short, to really focus all your attention on her. I mean, how do you think she would feel if you were ogling at, salivating over, and cavorting with other women while on your date with her? Click here to read more…

A Man’s POV: How it Makes Me Feel When… I’ve Been Dumped for Another Man

By Patrick Curry

Somehow, someway, somewhere you meet her. Not just her, but Her. Then, you get to know her, and it’s great. Then you fall, really fall for her, and it’s fantastic. Your relationship takes off, all systems go, the months fly by and things couldn’t be better. Colors are brighter, foods tastier, and the whole nine yards. Until, all of a sudden, just like that, out of the blue nowhere, she finds someone else, she blows you off. So, women ask, how does it feel for a guy when he’s blown off?

To give you an honest and blunt opinion, it is a miserable experience. Absolutely miserable. Click here to read more…

A Man’s POV: How it Makes Me Feel When… She Just Want’s to Be Friends

By Mark Miller

“Damn You, Foundation of Friendship!”

Get this. At least six different times, I’ve had dates with the same type of woman —  one who has had a long history of wild, impulsive, passionate, no-holds-barred sex. She invariably finds something lacking in that lifestyle and decides to make a change. Starting with the very next man she dates. Who is invariably me. She tells me that I will not, in contrast to her sordid past, become the beneficiary of her uninhibited passions. No. With me, things will be different. Rather than her typical rushing into sex, she will hold out – and thus I will have to hold out – until she feels that we have established that all-important…(DRUMROLL)…Foundation of Friendship. Which will make the intimacy all the more special and long-lasting once it occurs. Don’t I agree?

Let me recreate one of these six magical conversations – or, better, monologues – that I’ve experienced. Share my pain:  “Mark, I’m really flattered that you find me attractive enough to want to become intimate. I’m very attracted to you, too. And in the past, it wouldn’t have been unusual for me to jump into bed with a guy on the first, second, or third dates. And, don’t get me wrong – I love sex and am a very passionate and giving lover. I crave sex. Click here to read more…

A Man’s POV: How it Makes Me Feel When… I Know She’s Into Me – But I’m Not Into Her

By Patrick D. Curry

“Could you pass me the keys to the car?” she asks him as she stares directly into his eyes. “But honey, there aren’t any pomegranates on sale,” he responds, as he absentmindedly gazes into the sky.

Click here to read more…

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About Jennifer

Jennifer Kelton

Jennifer Kelton CEO / founder Badonlinedates.com LLC is a Los Angeles native and a pioneer in the worldwide dating industry, investigating the game of love while providing encouragement and support since 2007, starting with the acclaimed dating book Don’t Use My Sweater like a Towel. An accomplished CEO, visionary and entrepreneur, Kelton’s work in the […]

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